Dear Diary,
I worked on three of my patterns today. The big red rug is finished and on the wall of the studio. My new book is getting some finishing touches, and today, except for the walk I have not left the house. It has been a quiet day spent at the frame, working on some small playful pieces. It is exciting to think that possibly, I could hook every one of my patterns over time. Today I worked on the”Old Rose” chairpad giving it a creamy white background, instead of the traditional dark backgrounds that I tend to choose for that style of mat. Mixing whites and creams with some fancy undyed yarns has become one of my favorite floral backgrounds. Colour jumps off of creamy white. I know that from hanging art but really we forget the simple rules, in pursuit of new truths sometimes, only to come right back to what we always knew.
Today I did traditional things, cooked a roast beef on my woodstove, made homemade blueberry muffins, a cranberry loaf, and hooked for four hours. It was a winter day, spent peacefully alone, making things. Sustenance found in the simplest of ways. It is early January, and January requires committment as we follow it throough. It traditionally is a month of broken promises to ourselves, but perhaps, ever hopefully, this year will be different, and our peromises to ourself will be kept and renewed.
We had a good laugh in the studio the other day, when one woman said, “My resolution is to be nicer to my husband.” Someone piped up,”You know what that means, more home cooking, and more sex.” Our resolutions are our own though and really how we carry them out is up to us. We can adapt them, change them, let them grow with us. When I think of a resolution as a promise to myself, it becomes much less arduous, and more like a gift. Last year, I promised myself yoga, and a year later I am still committed. Twenty five years ago I had my last cigarette on New Years eve in a bar near the Halifax waterfront. These are two I remember, but really I make promises to myself all the time. I do not have to wait for the new year. Every time I start a rug, I promise to finish it. You can start promising yourself something at anytime.
Everytime I honour a promise to myself I grow a little more, and become a little more who I am meant to be. Sometimes those promises are unseen, or unheard, but they are part of starting and finishing, of growing and changing. They are the seeds of ideas, brought to life. Trusting ourselves to carry through for our own self, and those we love, is important. When we break our commitment to ourself we should have a dialogue with our own self to sort out the hows and whys of what happened, just like you would with a loving friend. I did not really make any resolutions this year but I did set out a few ideas for myself to play with and carry through. They are promises I made to myself. I find that I like to keep these bits close to my chest, because they are really just for me. They are my effort to be a little better, a tad kinder, a nick stronger or what have you. This year I did not announce anything but I thought about the idea of resolution and it took me a few places I needed to go. As always , I’m still thinking, and sorting, but for now it’s back to the mat.
Deanne
That is one gorgeous rug. I bet it is even more wonderful in real life. You are an inspiration, not only in your work, but your writing as well.
Sincerely,
Deirdre